What's In A Space?

Offences against children can occur in any environment. In a recent case I worked with, a three and a half year old girl was assaulted by an extended family member visiting her home. This news of the assault was brought to the attention of the parents by the child’s preschool teacher, who the child confided in. Amongst the several cases of sexual assault against children that I have worked with, this was the first time a school picked up the cues from a child, proactively but discretely probed further into the matter and documented it with strict actionables and recommendations to the parents. If not for the prompt action by the teacher and the school leadership, the child would probably still be victimised. This incident reinforced my belief that ‘safe spaces’ play a crucial role in the safety, development and wellbeing of every child. 

What do we mean by a ‘safe space’? 

A safe space for children is a place where children can feel secure, supported and free from judgment. Safe spaces are important for a child's mental well-being, and can help them reflect on difficult situations.  

‘Safe spaces’ do not naturally exist but need to be created by adults for children. They go much beyond CCTV surveillance and ‘child proof’ infrastructure. A child could have more than one safe space in his/her ecosystem and each space could fulfil different needs for the child. Safe spaces play a dual role in the nurture of children. They not only protect the child from harm and provide a sense of security to the child but also make children more independent and resilient for their integration into the community.  

Children are dependents. They depend on us to fulfil every single need, from nourishment to self-actualization. When a child experiences conflict, it disturbs the natural state and development of the child, creating havoc in his/her mind due to the lack of reasoning and understanding of what is happening and why it is happening. In a safe space, adults are not only compassionate towards the needs of a child but are also vigilant, alert and quick to act. They feel responsible for the child’s safety and will work towards preventing conflict, making the child independent and resilient rather than only intervening or protecting the child. 

The image below will help us understand the value system that stakeholders in the child’s ecosystem embody to make a place safe for the child. 

It takes effort to even make a child's home a safe space. It is important that guardians and caregivers ensure that places that a child is repeatedly exposed to are ones where they feel comfortable and can express themselves without fear of judgement and harm. 

I live in the heart of Mumbai, in a crowded neighbourhood. Unlike the newer residential developments, our neighbourhood is quite congested with limited dedicated space for children. However, over the last few years, our children have managed to create a peer group for themselves, with children ranging from the age of 4 to 14 years. They play, study, celebrate and spend time together. They feel responsible for each other's well being. There are times when there is conflict within the group but they have each other's back. They long for this company. It has become their safe space. This would not have been possible without the silent effort of like-minded parents who quietly monitor the group. They ensure access to a place for them to play and meet, monitor their  activities/games/discussions in a discreet manner so as to ensure it is age appropriate and safe for all participants. These parents also  sensitise other adults in the community and encourage them to foster this group. Having seen the impact it has had on the kids, parents and guardians make it a point to ensure their children regularly engage with each other. All it takes is compassion and collaboration on part of adults in the environment.    

Every child deserves safe spaces and every place must be a safe space for children. Let us sensitise and mobilise our community to make it one. 

-Pallavi Lotlikar